Random Acts of Love

Eyes that hold secrets

As someone who suffers from bouts of depression from time to time, I realize that showing people love and compassion is not as easy as it may sound. I live in a city where you can experience Winter, Spring, Summer and Fall all in one week and sometimes (to me) little things matter during these crazy moments, like a Java Chip Frappacino from Starbucks.

But this is really not the point of this blog. I realize that if you have never dealt with depression, then what I am going to say may seem harsh but to those that have dealt with this illness, I have a question for you. Does trying to spread love and receive love become a lot more difficult when you are depressed? I tend to shut myself off from the rest of the world and wollow in my sorrows, but I also see and feel how pushing the love I crave out effects me and I am trying to do better.

Sometimes, I'm filled with this feeling inside of me that makes me want to share with others all the love I have in my heart. I can't help but give out words of encourgament and I make it my intention to make someone else feel good and smart and important. Other times, I will go for days and not speak one positive word to others or to myself.

I am not encouraging this type of behavior, I am just saying that this is what I have a tendency to do. Don't take it personal if you have experienced this from me. When I am in depress mode, It is very hard for me to show myself (let alone other people),

any type of compassion or love. Those feelings are not accessible to me at the time, and it's not because I don't want to, but during that time I have nothing to give and I am feeling trap in this mental space of feeling unusable.

But that is exactly what it is......it's a trap. When I do fight through to give out an encouraging word, I am never regretful. I feel more human and back to my old self. It doesn't have to be anything extravagant. Something like an encouraging text to a friend or paying it forward, or letting someone merge into traffic during rush hour, goes a long way. Encouraging myself to do random acts of love makes me feel more connected to people around me again.

We don't always have to feel kind, to be kind. You don't always have to feel compassionate to show someone compassion. Even during our darkest times, we can always stop and think about whether or not we are in a situation that we can show some type of love. I know that everyone does not always deserve our kindness, but let's be the bigger person. So if not for anyone else, spread love and show compassion so that you can grow and nurture your own heart....and treating yourself to a java chip frappacino doesn't hurt either.

Peace and Blessing,

The InspireHER